Drunk Tommy

SweetBands St. Patrick’s Day Contest!

Here at SweetBands, we love three things: sweatbands, the movie Purple Rain (starring The Artist Formerly Known As Prince), and drinking until we pee our pants. Installing a projector in our warehouse helped satisfy our first two passions. (Have you ever watched Purple Rain on laser disc while surrounded by the most impressive selection and inventory of high-quality sweatbands in the world? Yeah, we didn’t think so…) But once SweetBands took off, we were left with a quandary over how to effectively run a sweatband empire while maintaining our commitment to excessive drinking.

We tried a company policy that limited our morning drinking to only beer; pushing the hard stuff to afternoons and evenings. This worked well until we realized just how delicious Baileys and Coco Puffs can be as a brunch item. But after a SweetBands staff meeting turned into a four-hour nap, we decided that it was time to make the hard decision and stop day-drinking in the office altogether.

Soon after, things really started turning around at SweetBands. It was plainly obvious that drinking had affected our work and some changes were in order. After a sober audit of the shipping workflow, we discovered that our warehouse manager was actually a functioning illiterate and that most of our shipments had ended up in the trunk of his Dodge Caravan. We also learned that the East Coast of the United States is actually three hours ahead of us and not behind. This seemed to be the reason for several missed conference calls with a vendor in Florida.

While our lack of weekday-drinking helped SweetBands grow as a company, it did not douse our individual yearnings for long, drunken nights and 2 a.m. screaming matches with food carts unwilling to give us another hotdog after we dropped ours on the sidewalk. It’s this dedication that sends chills down the spines of all SweetBands employees when St. Patrick’s Day is mentioned. So, as a company of dedicated drinkers, we decided there was no better way to celebrate this wonderful holiday than with a contest.

The Drunk Band is clearly the best accessory one can wear on St. Patrick’s Day…and we want to see you step it up a notch. Take a few shots of Jameson in the morning, talk loudly about your Grandma Sweeney, sing Danny Boy even though you don’t know the words, high-five a firefighter, fist bump a cop, fight your roommate in the alley, make out with a stranger on a smoke break, puke a little, dance like a leprechaun on a table, fall from a light pole, get arrested, whatever! Just post your best Drunk Band pics to Flickr and tag them “SweetBands” for your chance to win. All posted photos will magically show up in our Band Heads gallery and the best three photos will win a free SweetBand! All other photos will earn you a 25%-off coupon on your next SweetBands purchase. Just like Tee-ball and the Special Olympics, everyone is a winner!

* The contest starts today and ends on March 21st

 

 

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